The Nerd and the Assassin
by River Tam
Summary: "Chuck...tell me our story." Read and Review. First Chuck story, so be kind.
1. Chapter 1

She wanted to get out of the spy business, and I wanted to stay a spy. In the end, we both got the fairytale we wanted…just not with each other. And I guess that's what hurt me the most. I had learned to love Sarah over the years, and when I realized she wasn't going to love me back, I learned to give it up or get over it and move on. Casey told me that me that sometimes it's easier to move on and just forget. How do you forget five years of contact?

"I feel like I'm broken," Sarah murmured quietly, sitting on the beach where she'd gone for the last week. Since Ellie and Awesome had left, I found it increasingly difficult to spend time away from Sarah while she healed. Morgan tried, but it wasn't going to work and he knew it. "I feel like I'm missing a vital piece of my life."

I looked to see if the ring was on her finger, somehow expecting it to be. Every day since I found her on the beach, it became commonplace to tell our story over and over again. She loved hearing it. With every complacent laugh, I realized that this was becoming real to her. I even acted the scenes out for her sometimes. It helped her to relate better. I smiled softly at her. "You're not broken; the parts aren't out of stock. It's okay, we can fix it."

She smiled carefully and watched me move around to cover her with a blanket. I think fear probably got the better of her, because she tensed significantly. "I can't help but wonder why you still care so much about someone who doesn't remember you."

I smiled and wrapped the blanket around her, praying she would learn to accept me. "Because you saw me when I was invisible. You know, for so long I wondered why a beautiful woman like you would love a nerdy guy like me, and I remembered something Awesome told me once about how you don't choose who you love. It just happens one day." I looked down at my hand where my ring finger still stayed. She may have forgotten me, but we were still married. I smiled casually to her, watching as her blonde locks were pushed about by the wind. "I will always care about you, Sarah Walker. You're my wife."

"What if I never remember these memories you're so fond of?" Sarah inquired softly.

"Then that's okay. We've got an entire lifetime to make new memories. In fact, look at this as a start to a very beautiful beginning. Just because the chapter is over, doesn't mean the book has ended, Sarah. We've got our whole lives to figure this out. And if you don't remember me, that's fine. I'll keep trying until you fall in love with me again," I murmured burying my toes in the sand. There was a shell on the sandy floor that I couldn't help but pick up and examine. "When you were kidnapped, I was sure I'd never see you again. I was positive you'd died. After a week with no contact, I was sure that was the case. But then you showed up again, it felt as though my whole life was brought to a grim close. I wanted to believe that our story wasn't over yet. And, to some extent, it still isn't over."

She looked at me with those soft green eyes, hoping for some reassurance that I could give in my kind words. I had no job. I had nowhere to go. I had no one to talk to. Essentially, all I had was Sarah right now. "We didn't draw to each other because of a job, but rather because we needed each other."

"Exactly," I whispered. "Because we still need each other."

She smiled that beautiful smile and I found it hard to not kiss her.

"Sarah, did I ever tell you about the time I lost my memories?" I inquired, pushing my finger around in the sand, building a small castle. She looked at me, her eyes searching for a tell. I looked back at her and handed her the beautiful pearl colored shell. "You came to the doctor's house and told him to help me remember, because you loved me and didn't want me to forget you."

There were times I felt like I was dealing with a child, and there were times when the patience paid off. Those times were far and few in between, but I remembered a scene from the Fantastic Four, when the Thing went to visit his wife for the first time since the accident. He didn't mean to startle her, but she called him a monster. For a while, that's how I felt about Sarah, as though she was a monster and it was her fault for forgetting. But in the end, I realized she did what she did to protect me.

Her eyes full of understanding, looked over at me again. "I did that for you?"

"You did a lot of things for me," I answered quietly. "That's why I took a bullet for you back at the house. Because I know you'd have done the same for me."

She smiled softly and looked out at the ocean, feeling the breeze run it's fingers through her hair playfully. I could tell she was thinking. She didn't speak for me to know she was thinking about the story. "Chuck, can you tell me the last part again?"

I blinked several times. "The last part?"

She nodded and I could tell she was thinking about this for some time. Her voice finally rose above a tiny whisper. "The train. I want to know about the train."

I started to tell her the story and reached into my pocket for my wallet. Inside it was a photograph that I pulled out and handed to her. It was scribbled hastily onto a brochure, a white picket fence with the nerd and the assassin holding a baby. She stared at it for an eternity before looking to me again. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head slowly. "I remember this."

I sat up quickly, looking to the photograph in her hand. "You remember the picture?"

"I told you on the train that I would never forget this." She told me, her voice filling with tears. I had never seen Sarah cry, except for the night that we found out she wasn't pregnant. While she felt relieved about that, I knew in the silence of the night, she was upset about it. "I told you that no matter what happened, I would always remember this."

My breath caught as she told me, in full detail, what happened on the train. That was when a small nagging voice in the back of my head decided it wasn't going to shut up. _We're making progress._

"Slow progress is still progress," I commented, touching the picture in her hand. "You keep that for now, okay? I'm sure you'll want it later."

She looked up at me with tears in her eyes. "Chuck…where did Han Solo go?"

I blinked several times, wondering what on earth she was implying. "What are you talking about?"

"When Clara was born, you were trying to decide what to do with Han Solo and Chewbacca. So, you and Morgan decided to give them to Clara instead of split them up." She answered, looking me dead in the eye. "Did they go with Clara when Ellie and Awesome moved to Chicago?"

I blinked for what seemed like an eternity, my mouth agape at the thought. "They went with Clara, but how do you know that? It wasn't part of the story."

She gave me a shy smile and watched the sunset on the ocean. "Bits and pieces at a time, I remember." Her body fell backwards into the sand, where she stared up at the sky. "You've been telling me this story for five years now, you don't think I'll ever remember, do you?"

"I don't really know," I admitted, laying back with her. "But if you do, I'd be eternally happy."

"This is where we came on our first date," She commented, looking at the sky, her blue eyes watching the clouds move impatiently across the sky. "You were going to propose to me here."

I had left that part out of the story because I felt it was insignificant. I could tell that thinking about all of this was likely hurting her, so instead, I stood and went to leave. "Sarah, we've made great progress today, but I think we should stop for now."

"Chuck, wait," She jumped to her feet rather quickly and stared at me as I walked away. I didn't turn around. "I love you. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you." She paused and continued, replaying the moment in her mind. "Without you, I'm nothing but a spy. Come back to me, Chuck. I want to marry you."

Suddenly I flashbacked to Thailand when Sarah came and rescued me. I could feel every moment of my life stop right then and there. Such intimate memories and she could remember them. I turned to look at her, my eyes watching her move closer to me. "Do you remember me, Sarah?"

"Not enough to be your wife right now, but I promise I will remember one day. I will remember and be your wife again, so you can stop searching for her." She smiled and came closer until there was no space left between us. And then, out of nowhere, her blonde head lay against my chest, listening to my heartbeat.

In that moment, it all felt right in the world.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>

* * *

><p><em>Someone explained to me that the series finale isn't so bad if you look at it from a certain point of view. Instead of looking at it as if she forgot everything, imagine if there was a voiceover in the beginning of the first episode ever, where Sarah says "Chuck, tell me our story", and it's actually five years later on the beach, where he had just finished telling the story. So, that's the idea I ran with. I plan on continuing this. =)<em>

_I remember watching a cast interview for the final episode when they asked where they saw Sarah and Chuck at the end of the series, and Yvonne answered with "pregnant", and Zachary said he'd liked to have remained a spy. He also mentioned something about one of the comic books, when Sarah calls him while he's out on a mission, to tell him something about their son losing his first tooth. He said that's how he envisioned the future for Chuck and Sarah. I like to hold onto that vision. =)_


	2. Chapter 2

I sat in my bedroom with a photograph in my hand, smiling at the memory it brought. It felt like the last five years were washed away with bleach, and there was no returning them. I spent so much time trying to get her to notice me, to love me, and for what? My heart broke every time I stared at that photo, where I held her in my arms, a bright smile on her face. The gown that she had chosen was simple and elegant at the same time, Ellie had helped her with her hair, it was the first of many times where I felt I had truly lost her. The sequence of events that precursor that moment were nothing compared to the horror of actually losing her.

With numb hands, I put the picture back onto my nightstand, where it had sat for every single day since I lost her. I looked around the room at the small indicators that my wife had been there before. On the nightstand was her hairbrush, a few bottles of perfume, and a necklace she'd always worn. Her clothes were still in the dresser drawer, far and few in between, since most of it had been moved back to her apartment. I felt like she was slowly moving away from me, taking her memories with it.

I moved over to the closet with hesitant steps, looking into the dark tiny room that once held all of Sarah's belongings. I knew she didn't have much, she was always a light packer. I went through the stacks of boxes of Star Wars memorabilia until I came to a standard, CIA issued, glass box. It was light, small, about the size of my palm, and held a flash drive inside of it. I stared quietly at the drive for a long time, my heart telling me not to do what my head talked me into.

"No," I told myself, holding the item close. "She's not dead, there's no need for this yet."

I remembered that my mom explained to me that some spies would write out their wills, to allow for the person to get less resonance with the death. But others, like herself and Sarah, decided to put it onto a digital format, so the widow could hear their voice again for one last time. Some argued it was harder to deal with that way, but I would argue differently. I would want to see her one last time.

I ran my finger over the glass case, deciding to hide it with mine in the dresser drawer. It was an obvious location to hide something that powerful, but I couldn't bring myself to move it to a place I'd forget. I put it in the same location that Sarah left mine, pushing the negative thoughts aside. Several minutes passed in shocked silence when I heard General Beckman cough. I spun around to see her sitting in her office on my computer screen. "General…"

She nodded. "Bartowski. It's good to see you again; I see you're in good health."

"I wish I could say the same for Sarah," I mumbled, sitting at the desk and running my hands through my hair. "It's so frustrating. She can remember little details, but not me physically. She knows we were together, but she doesn't know that she loves me still."

She sighed. "This is why I warned you not to get romantically invested in your handler. Because situations like this happen."

I stared at the woman who had been in charge of me for five long years, my heart pounding in my ears. "Morgan got his memories back, so can Sarah."

"Morgan hadn't been completely gone yet," she corrected. "They hadn't effectively erased five years of memories on Morgan."

"I need her back, General. I can't live without her. I thought I could, but I just can't do it." I whispered, my voice finally cracking. Tears prickled my eyes as I watched the older woman pull a file from her desk drawer. "I can't begin to fathom life without her."

"You might want to start now." Beckman opened the folder and clasped her hands together, leaning over her desk menacingly. "We may have a lead that can help Sarah, but it requires your help to create a new intersect."

I began to protest; "My heart isn't in it, General, I can't-"

"You can't? Or you _won't_?" she corrected, staring at me point blank. "Since you downloaded our last copy of the intersect, it's not necessary to keep it in a hard copy. G.R.E.T.A. had informed me that since the intersect is basically a database of all our information from the history of the CIA and NSA, you could, essentially, do the same with Sarah."

"Ellie said the same thing," I answered, looking down. "But the only video footage I have is from when we got married, I don't remember anything else."

Beckman sighed. "You've been a spy for five years, Chuck, and you don't expect us to have footage on both of you? While I admit, we may not have enough to completely recompile five years of missing memories, there is one other team that rivals ours."

I raised a brow and waited for her to continue.

The woman gave a sigh of defeat. "Jeff and Lester."

I hadn't thought of that. I snapped my fingers. "Right! Jeff had footage that I didn't even have for the wedding ceremony. He's got to have stuff on her."

Beckman pressed some buttons and brought up a map on screen. A tiny green dot blipped in the background. "Apparently Jeffster's brand of crazy is acceptable in Europe. They're in Hanover, Germany, with their producer for a _Very Large Production Company_…as stupid as that sounds, that is the name. The building is located at the corner of Friedrich-Heeren street and Eden street, room 218."

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked hesitantly, my voice full of fear. "You want me to go get them?"

"The government has unfrozen your assets to Carmichael Industries. We've also fenced you a small amount from your last mission, saving the theatre. Use it well, Charles. Bring Agent Walker back to us." General Beckman spoke before closing the connection.

I sat in silence for an eternity before quietly plucking my cell phone off of the desk, dialing Morgan's number. He answered on the second ring, his voice as perky as it usually was. "Hey, Morgan. Remember that trip that you and Alex were planning to take to Germany?"

Morgan chuckled. "Yeah, man. The one we don't have the money for?"

Alex added something about asking her step-mother, but Morgan shooed her away. I continued speaking quietly. "Want to go on one last mission for old time sake? You can bring Alex with."

"Man, I can't ask you to do that. Where are you getting the money from?" Morgan inquired.

I smirked inwardly. "The CIA is sending me on one more mission. They fenced me the money from saving the General, and unfroze Carmichael Industries assets. Please, Morgan, I need to do this for Sarah."

"You don't need me, you have the intersect." Morgan quietly continued.

I spoke rather quietly, for fear of someone listening in. "Morgan, buddy, I need you to help me out with this. I can't do it alone, it requires a brand of crazy that I just don't have. I need you to negotiate with terrorists."

"And you want me to bring Alex along? Are you deranged?" Morgan shouted.

I sighed and growled something bitterly. "I need to speak with Jeff and Lester, okay?"

"Man, why didn't you just say so? Sure, we'll come along."

* * *

><p>Alex slept against Morgan's shoulder, while my best friend and I went over the details of the mission in the rental car. Though it wasn't much of a mission, getting them to agree to anything now that they had money would be virtually impossible. I spoke calmly, trying not to lose my nerve. "Sarah agreed that if we could get this to work, she would be willing to try it. It sounds absurd, downloading memories…but I suppose if you can download details, you can download memories…"<p>

Morgan nodded in agreement. "Listen, bro, we need to appeal to their perverted side. They can get women as much as they want, but there are only two women they ever wanted to see naked. I'm also positive that they've got pictures of one of them."

I stared at Morgan in the rear-view mirror, trying not to think of what those two had up their sleeves. Jeff and Lester had finally been promoted to CIA status, only by fluke, because of what had happened at the concert hall. I could only imagine what they roped Beckman out of to get that title. "Since they know our secret, there isn't a lot of wheeling and dealing we can do," I mumbled turning the corner. "It's not like I can get some hot chick to pose nude for them."

"They can get that on the internet," Morgan replied, nudging Alex awake. "Sweetie, remember what we talked about on the plane when Chuck was in the bathroom? This is your first official spy mission, your father would be so proud."

Alex blinked a few times. "I'm not so pleased with this idea."

"It will save Sarah, and besides, it's better to let them see it instead of have them think about all the raunchy things they obsess over," Morgan concluded. "Besides, you always told me you wanted to be a model."

She sighed and brushed back her long auburn hair. "I guess that's fair. Did you bring the cat suit?"

"Of course, my love."

I stared blankly into the rear view mirror, pulling into a space across the street. Cat suit? Wasn't Alex significantly shorter than Sarah? I rolled my eyes and imagined Casey's daughter walking in the heels that Sarah preferred. "How did you get that out of my closet?" I inquired as Alex zippered the latex suit all the way up to her neck.

Morgan smiled. "You're a heavy sleeper when you're depressed, remember?"

"No, I don't think I do." I replied.

"Savannah Hutchens," Morgan whispered in my ear before opening the door for Alex. "Remember your cover, babe."

Alex nodded. "Riley Covens, got it." She smirked and kissed his cheek. "And you're my body guard, Marcus Colburn."

Morgan fixed his tie. "Navy SEAL, remember that."

I rolled my eyes as I climbed out of the car, watching Alex's long legs unfold from the car. She did pull off latex rather well. She smiled at me before making her way to the building. When she came to the entrance, she spoke nearly flawlessly in German. The receptionist smiled. "Right this way, Miss Covens." She led them down a pathway of doors before stopping to stare at me. "Who is this?" She inquired softly.

Before Alex could speak, I had already flashed. "Samuel Cartwright, her translator," I replied in German. The woman seemed satisfied with the answer. Alex turned and cussed me out in German, yelling that she needed to speak on my behalf.

I nodded.

The door opened to Jeff's office, the normally unkempt man now well groomed. His thinning hair was likely replaced by a toupee. He stared at the bombshell of a woman, his jaw nearly dropping at the visual. Alex stood with her legs spread, tapping her foot impatiently, her hand on her hip. We stayed outside, as per her request. She closed the door and turned to Jeff, inching closer to the mahogany desk. "Hello, Jeffery Barnes."

He stammered with his words. "Alex McHugh, it's so nice to see you in all your glory again."

She came over to the desk and pushed his chair back, sitting in his lap. "Jeff, sweetie, I need you to do me a favor."

Jeff immediately complied. "What's that, Agent Sexy?"

Alex kissed his cheek and smiled. "I need you to find me any information you have on Sarah Walker-Bartowski."

"What's it for?" Jeff asked.

Alex struggled to think of a good lie. "Sarah's going to be given a medal of honor, and we need footage to make her look like an amazing person."

Apparently Jeff bought it, because he began to type in the computer and transfer files to the flash drive that she provided for him. Once everything was transferred, she unzipped the top part of the suit and dropped the drive between her breasts. "You're an amazing person, Jeffery Barnes." She stood to leave, halfway to the door when she heard his question.

"What do I get out of this deal?" Jeff inquired.

Alex turned and unzipped the suit enough that Jeff could get a frontal view of her 'assets', then zipped it up and left the room when the man passed out behind the desk. She turned to Morgan first. "Well, with that image firmly burned into his mind, I'm pretty sure I've bred another obsession into his creepy brain."

"Did you get the files?" I asked, holding out my hand for the drive. She reached between her breasts to retrieve the files, Morgan nearly fainted. She handed the sealed drive to me and I took the small part out and put it into my watch, staring as images passed by. "Holy…he really was obsessed with Sarah. I think we'll be needing a country-wide restraining order eventually."

As we left the building, I could hear Morgan speaking to someone on his phone. He handed it to me and I answered, my voice quiet. "General Beckman…"

"Grimes informed me that your team succeeded on the mission. When will you have the intersect complete?" She inquired.

I struggled for the words. "In a week, at most."

"Sarah turned herself into CIA custody." Beckman continued.

I was shocked for words. Five years of this and she finally turned herself in? I wondered why when I heard Beckman's words through the speaker on the phone. "I've got Dr. Leo Dryfus on the case. I assume you remember him from when your memories were lost?"

"Why did Sarah turn herself in?" I asked, hesitating with the words. It wasn't like her to do something like that. I knew that deep in my heart, Sarah would have never compromised herself.

She frowned. "Charles, I think we need to talk about this in person. You know where my office is."

That's when I realized that something was seriously wrong.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>

* * *

><p>I switched between green and blue for Sarah's eyes in the first chapter. It's blue. I'll fix it later. I think I had also said Chuck's eyes were blue. I'll fix that later as well. I was thinking of a different show when I wrote the descriptions.<p>

**Please read and review.** I've gotten over 30 people that added this to their alerts, but not one review. I don't even care if it's just one, I just want to know that people enjoyed the story, and where I can improve on it. Please and thanks? From one starving author to another? =)


End file.
